Passion or Obsessed?
Last night "my boys" were back in Spokane for a performance at Glover Middle School. I was beyond excited! As you may have read in a previous post, I have grown to love these boys and the other children in the choir very much. It was so nice to see them. What was even better was that they got to stay at my house again for the one night they were in town.
This was the first time that I had hosted children in my home that I did not have a previous relationship with and it was good training for what we will go through doing foster care. Let me tell you, this was a learning experience for me and I learned a lot about myself during this process. I really learned that being a foster parent is not for me. I cannot love and then let go without a lot of pain & sorrow. I have made up my mind that I will only adopt through the foster care system because it is the best and least expensive way that I will become a parent. You see, my husband & I do not make a lot of money, but we do enjoy our jobs. I would also love to adopt internationally, but the lack of funds prohibits that at this time. Although, if it is God's will for us to adopt a child from another country, I know he will provide.
During the time that the boys were away, I did a lot of thinking and praying. I asked myself, "What was I passionate about in my life?". I tend to be a follower, not a leader, have stayed in my comfort zone, and have gone about life without a "real" passion for something. I have had & currently have what I would call passion for stuff, but I am really re-evaluating this "passion" that I have currently. I am asking myself if this passion is real or if it is something different all together. These boys and the "Pope" have helped me realize this.
I have always wanted to go to Germany. I love the history of this country and since my husband has family there, it would be a great place to visit. These past couple of weeks this has changed a bit. I still would like to visit Germany, but I now want to go to Rwanda even more. So much so, that at this time, I am trying to soak up all the information I can about Rwanda. I want to give back to the children that I have had the privilege to know and love. They gave so much when they have so little. You know the "thing" they gave the most of....LOVE! These children know how to LOVE! It really doesn't stop with the children either. Auntie Barbara, Auntie Alice, Uncle Ivan, "Pope", and Uncle Henry- they all gave love to you because that is what they have the most of!
The Asante Children's Choir gave me so much and I want to give back to them in some way. Prayer is a given, but I want to give back more than just that. I know that money is needed as well to help build Hope Village, but at this time that is just not something we can do. I do, however, have time & lots of it right now. I am currently working part-time and I have no children at the moment. I think that time is the best "thing" I can give the choir. I have talked to "Pope" about how I can help these children that have given me so much. I talked to him about being a contact person in Spokane for the choir for future trips. Using connections and starting new relationships to help book, help find a Dr. or Dr's that would "donate" medical & dental care for the choir in the future without stepping on someone else's toes, should they make Spokane their "home base". In doing this, I will have to step out of my comfort zone and put myself "out there". It also means that I will really have to start networking. I am willing to do this because I am passionate about this choir, what they stand for, and the love this choir has shown me.
It is amazing what an impact those 2 young boys have had on my life. I want to have that kind of impact on their lives and future choir member's lives. I want to give back to the choir who has given me so much. I am, however, asking myself....is this a new found passion or am I obsessed?
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